When Life is Short.... #NulisRandom2015 Day 4

Tania sudah naik ke tempat tidurnya. Saya juga sudah mengganti baju ke baju yang nyaman buat tidur.
Tapi beberapa hari ini Tania susah dan tidak bisa (atau tidak mau) tidur siang. Dia tahu konsekwensinya adalah harus langsung tidur setelah makan malam. Seperti biasa dan layaknya anak-anak seusia dia, pasti saja ada penolakan dan pembangkangan.

Malam ini, Tania kena marah. karena dia berlama-lama naik ke tempat tidur walaupun dia telah memberikan janji penuhnya tadi siang. Tapi dia sedang berbicara dengan Opa dan Omanya lewat HP saya. Opa dan Oma sedang ada di Jakarta untuk health check-up. Saya mensetting HP ke speaker mode agar Tania bisa leluasa bercerita. Lalu kemudian setelah menutup telpon, Tania masih saja jingkrak-jingkrakan di tempat tidur sedangkan saya harus memposting pemberitanian penundaan pengumpulan Tugas Akhir pada mahasiswa saya karena libur kepala puasa. Akhirnya, Saya menaikan nada saya dan 'memerintahkan' dia untuk menggosok gigi.

Lalu SMS itu masuk....

"Telah dipanggil pulang anak dari rekan kerja kita saudari  Xyz. Mohon doa untuk beliau dan keluarganya"

Badan saya ngilu dan lemas. Teman dosen saya ini sudah bertumbuh dalam hati saya. Kami sudah menjadi dekat dan dukanya adalah duka saya (kami) juga.

Baru minggu lalu ia bercerita tentang anaknya yang sudah mendingan dari sakit dan telah kembali ceria.
Baru minggu lalu ia bercerita tentang anaknya dalam English Club Session yang saya pandu.
Baru minggu lalu, Tuhan! ... Dia sungguh optimis anaknya sudah baik-baik saja.

Anaknya belum juga 1 tahun... Saya rasa sekarang dia pun sedang berteriak 'Mengapa?"

Life is short for the little angel... membuat saya teringat sebait lagu CCM, Held by Natalie Grant

"To think that providence
Would take a child from his mother
While she prays, is appalling"

Beberapa saat yang lalu Tania akhirnya tertidur... Tidur sambil saya dekap erat.
Hati saya remuk mengingat saudari saya akan menghadapi malam-malam berat untuk entah berapa lama. Cobaan ini berat ya Tuhan.... Cobaan dan Ujian ini sungguh berat.

Kata dan kalimat apa yang bisa kami bilang untuk membuatmu tersenyum
Kami cuma bisa topang dalam doa.... Kami cuma bisa bilang kami berdiri bersamamu
Kami... saudarimu.

------------------------
HELD
by Natalie Grant
(translated by me)

Two months is too little, they let him go     

          (Dua Bulan. Dia masih terlalu kecil. Mereka harus melepaskannya)
They had no sudden healing

          (mereka tidak punya kesembuhan / keajaiban)
To think that providence

          (untuk berpikir bahwa yang maha kuasa)
Would take a child from his mother

          (Akan mengambil seorang anak dari ibunya)
While she prays, is appalling

          (sementara ia berdoa, adalah hal yang mengerikan/menyedihkan)

Who told us we'd be rescued

          (siapa yang bilang kita akan diselamatkan)
What has changed and

          (apa yang sudah berubah)
Why should we be saved from nightmares

         (mengapa kita harus diselamatkan dari mimpi buruk ini)
We're asking why this happens to us

         (kami bertanya  mengapa hal ini terjadi pada kita)

Who have died to live, it's unfair

          (yang telah mati untuk kembali hidup, ini tidak adil)

This is what it means to be held

         (inilah yang rasanya ketika kita dipegang)
How it feels when the sacred is torn from your life

          (beginilah rasanya ketika yang tersuci dicabik keluar dari hidup kita)
And you survive

          (dan kita selamat - tetap hidup)

This is what it is to be loved and to know

          (inilah rasanya dicintai dan untuk tahu)
That the promise was that when everything fell

          (bahwa janjiNYA adalah ketika segala sesuatunya runtuh)
We'd be held

          (Kita akan selalu dipegangNYA)

 

This hand is bitterness

          (Tangan ini adalah kepahitan)
We want to taste it and

          (Kita ingin merasakannya dan)
Let the hatred numb our sorrows

          (membiarkan kebencian/kepedihan mematikan rasa dari kesedihan kita)
The wise hand opens slowly

          (Tangan yang Bijak itu terbuka dengan perlahan-lahan)
To lilies of the valley and tomorrow

           (bagi bunga Lily di padang dan untuk hari esok)

This is what it means to be held

         (inilah yang rasanya ketika kita dipegang)
How it feels when the sacred is torn from your life

          (beginilah rasanya ketika yang tersuci dicabik keluar dari hidup kita)
And you survive

          (dan kita selamat - tetap hidup)

This is what it is to be loved and to know

          (inilah rasanya dicintai dan untuk tahu)
That the promise was that when everything fell

          (bahwa janjiNYA adalah ketika segala sesuatunya runtuh)
We'd be held

          (Kita akan selalu dipegangNYA)

 

If hope if born of suffering

            (jika Pengharapan itu lahir dari Kesengsaraan)
If this is only the beginning

          (Jika ini hanyalah permulaannya)
Can we not wait for one hour

          (Tidakkah kita dapat menunggu satu jam lagi)
Watching for our Savior

         (menantikan Penyelamat kita)

This is what it means to be held

         (inilah yang rasanya ketika kita dipegang)
How it feels when the sacred is torn from your life

          (beginilah rasanya ketika yang tersuci dicabik keluar dari hidup kita)
And you survive

          (dan kita selamat - tetap hidup)

This is what it is to be loved and to know

          (inilah rasanya dicintai dan untuk tahu)
That the promise was that when everything fell

          (bahwa janjiNYA adalah ketika segala sesuatunya runtuh)
We'd be held

          (Kita akan selalu dipegangNYA)

Which one? Memasak atau Mencuci... #NulisRandom2015 Day 3

(Tulisan ini terinspirasi tulisan teman saya Ni Nyoman Anna dalam Nyomnyomblog.)


Definitelly memasak lah... Saya mau saja masak dari pagi sampe malam selama tidak disuruh mencuci.
Saya paling benci disuruh mencuci. Baik pakaian, piring, rumah dll. Tapi saya paling suka memasak.
Belum bisa disebut Ahli masak... karena saya masih belajar. Tapi sedikit demi sedikit ketrampilan memasak saya lebih terasah baik dari skill, pengetahuan, balancing rasa dll.

Saya suka masak karena saya suka makan... dan ini tentu tidak membuat badan saya berterima kasih. intinya, badan saya subur sekali hehehehe... sudah dua minggu ini saya perhatikan timbangan ini kok tidak turun dari 60 ya... bahkan naik 4 kilo... mwahahahahaha.... AIB!
Anyway.... bagi yang baca ini semoga anda satu golongan timbangan dengan saya sehingga anda merasa tidak sendirian. Saya sekarang (sudah) tidak malu (lagi) dengan berat badan. Sekali-kali masih di'ejek' suami... hehehehe... Tapi saya sangat happy dengan hidup saya. Timbangan has nothing to do with it.

OK balik ke memasak. Mahasiswa dan murid-murid saya yang lain tahu benar kalau saya addicted to Masterchef... hihihiihii... bahakan adik saya akan bilang "Katong bisa nonton lain selain masak-masak dan CSI-CSIan, ka seng?"... Oh ya, That's my other addiction ALL CSI. my favourite is still undoubtedly NCSI with Leroy Jethro Gibbs (Don't laugh SIMON!) and Ziva David.

As for mencuci dan membersihkan... Itu tunggu ada moodnya dulu. Kalo urusan mencuci piring, My mom selalu komplain kalau saya memasak dengan seluruh panci, baskom dll yang ada di lemari. Well, she does have a point. Tapi mau gimana lagi... saya masak 2 atau 3 masakan sekaligus jadi memang harus begitu dong... As for mencuci pakaian, thank GOD sudah ada Mesin cuci dan Laundry hehehe...

Membersihkan rumah dan kamar? Puji Tuhan, saya diberkati dengan Suami yang rapih... kadang dia suka jengkel juga saya sukanya naroh barang sembarangan. Tapi sejak menikah, kamar saya (kami) selalu rapi, bersih dan bebas debu... ehem... What???!... I am NOT perfect, people!
I love you Honey!

When in Doubt.... #nNulisRandom2015 Day 2

I have the privilege of being able to make the choice of staying with my daughter and see her grow up. My husband and I both have this privileged of choice. This morning I woke up to Tania sleeping Beside me on our bed. Simon explained that she wet her bed last night. Simon was frazzled from not enough sleep and I still have my headache from last night.

Both Simon and I are living quite a different lifestyle we had few years ago. Simon worked at an International Humanitarian NGO which deployed him to places around Indonesia and abroad as well as frequent travel domestically and abroad. I was deeply rooted with peace building, reconciliation and interfaith activities with grassroots Ambon. but then we both went abroad to study and then.... we had Tania.

I must admit, I felt lost and jealous of others in motion around me. I am not second guessing and regret having Tania... God knows I never did. But frankly any mother/parents will definitely go through this phase of transition. I am glad that both Simon and I go through this together and that we have the same ideas of what we want out life to become.

Tania became the center of our world. We arrange our schedule and activities around her. It's not easy trying to put everything in proportion. We are blessed beyond measures that we have and are able to make our own choice. After our return from our study in UK. Simon and I spent few months not working and just enjoying our time with Tania. We are blessed with families of both sides who have no expectation or demand of us. It's the way our life and our society functions. Imagine what will become of us when we live in the 'western' society where it's almost dis empowering to live with your parents once you come of age. Once we marveled at the amazing simplicity and contentment of our life that we go around for more than a month with only Rp. 50,000,- (3.57 pounds or 4 dollar-ish) in our pockets. and yet, we never lack a thing.

When we wanted to start working, Simon and I went back teaching at my family run Language center where I can do that from home still watching over Tania. We went on countless picnics, stimulate Tania's learning, spend time playing and reading to her... just bonding with her. When we take more serious job as part time lecturer, Simon and I arrange that when one is teaching the other will stay with Tania. Still, on rare occasion where we both are needed, we have our extended family to fend for us.

Believe you me, though it sounded fairy tale-ish... It's not always so. The price of transition are always too real. We have one or two slip ups, arguments, frustration etc... but Thank God things work out in the end.

So why am I telling you this? I do not want to boast not drool you with my story. I am still battling urges to be free as the wind again. To spend my time roaming the city and do activities with my friends. But perhaps... I grow up... hehehehe... no... It will make growing up sounds so dull and ... wrong... I think having Tania give your life a better perspective. Children teach us not to be selfish.

Lately, I (we) have been busier. Business and work are running very well. Demand for our skills and traits are increasing. Then Tania dropped the bomb as she called me on the phone one night as I was riding the public transport back from my night class down at the city center.

"Mommy, Where are you?"
"Hi, honey. Mommy is in the (public) car. I am on my way home"
"This is awfuly late Mommy" (It was almost 8 PM. I will probably be home past 8)
"I know dear. I am sorry. I have just finished with my class. Have you had your dinner"
"Yes. I have. But you are very late. This is past dinner time"
"I know dear. I am sorry"
"Mommy you always never have dinner with me anymore. You said dinner is important for family"

She was 41/2 years old. She's my wake up call.
The most important thing in life that God gave you is your family. and I have lost sight of that. I let my 'work' define me. I neglect my little girl and my family.
So though it breaks my heart. I make a decision to postpone for a few month a class that I love very much to teach. The class where I still have so  much ideas to share with. I made a promise to myself to be more present for her. Simon and I enforce new rules. No Gadgets (phone, ipad, etc) on dining table at home or at the restaurants. We need to talk. We are loosing our valuable time to gadgets. This realization came to us one day when we were at the restaurants and I was texting a friend. Simon took away my phone and told me to look around the restaurant. Everyone at the tables were sitting side by side fixated to their phone. They do not even talk to each other. He said, "Do we want to be like that?". Hell, no I don't. So we bring pencil and paper. Tania draw and chat with us. We talked about things... important and nonsense. We argue... we connect.

Anyway, If you are able. If your life present you with choice then choose family (children,husband,wife) over work and other activities. But if you cannot, That's fine. don't beat yourself up because of it.
I do not blame nor look down to families who have to work around the clock to provide for their family. I salute them for making that sacrifice. You got to do what you got to do. I am also not better than those working full time mom. I know i may become one of them perhaps next year as the finalization of my official government employee status is instated. But when I do have to work 8-5, God help me to be present when I am with my little girl and my husband.

What Susie says.... #NulisRandom2015 Day 1

Kemarin saya dilantik menjadi pengurus sebuah organisasi baru. Setelah foto2nya beredar di dunia maya, saya mendapatkan beberapa tanggapan dan komentar. Banyak yang memberikan komentar positif tapi ada beberapa komentar yang membuat saya berpikir.

Seupil komentar ini adalah mengenai keraguan akan kredibilitas dan kemampuan orang-orang yang ada dalam kepengurusan tersebut. Ya, ini adalah organisasi baru dan Ya, mereka (dan saya) yang ada didalamnya adalah orang-orang muda. Ya, Kami belum cukup banyak makan asam garam. Ya, beberapa (dan bahkan semua kami) telah mencetak beberapa imej baik dan buruk.

Tapi bukankah semua manusia juga demikian?

Sekuat apapun manusia berusaha berbuat yang terbaik. Manusia mungkin melakukan kesalahan.
Sebaik apapun tindakan kita pasti ada orang yang melihat dari sisi yang terburuk.

Dalam hidup saya, selama bertumbuh dan berkembang, saya banyak mendapat dorongan positif baik dari orang tua, handai tolan, guru dan teman. Mereka semua percaya pada saya, pada kemampuan saya dan pada kerja keras saya. Pada suatu saat, saya sungguh percaya semua itu dan menjadi sombong.

Pepatah berbahasa Inggris mengatakan, "Pride goes before a fall" (Kesombongan adalah awal dari kejatuhan), dan hal ini terjadi pada saya. Dalam hidup saya yang sudah 30 tahun lebih ini, saya banyak mengalami kekecewaan dan kekalahan bahkan kejatuhan dan kesalahan. Namun semua itu membuat saya semakin bijak. Bukan untuk dilihat orang tapi bijak bagi diri sendiri agar saya dapat hidup damai.

Saya belajar bahwa saya tidak lebih baik dari orang lain. Puji Tuhan, saya punya beberapa pengalaman yang dianggap banyak orang lebih dari dari orang lain, namun itu tidak menjadikan saya yang paling baik.

Ketika tadi malam dan pagi ini saya mencermati setiap wajah dalam foto-foto hasil pelantikan kemarin. Saya melihat begitu banyak potensi dan pengalaman yang dapat mereka (dan saya) bawa dalam proses tugas mulia kami. Ya, saya tahu beberapa hal, tapi kawan-kawan saya tahu banyak hal yang saya tidak tahu dengan berkaca pada pengalaman mereka sendiri.

Kami punya awal yang sedikit gamang memang, namun pada hari gladi resik, ketika kami duduk melingkar bersama, ada satu pemikiran yang terus terngiang di kepala saya,

"We all have potentials. Everyone does. All it takes is for each and everyone of this individuals to be given a chance to shine. All it matters is if we work together to use our individuals and common strength to overcome our weakness."

Kemudian setelah membaca dan mendengar komentar-komentar ini ada teman yang suka sharing kutipan inspiratif dan dia mengirimkan foto diatas. "What Susie says of Sally, says more about Susie than of Sally".. bahwa apa yang dikatakan (baca: digosipkan, dibicarakan, dibisik-bisikan) oleh Susie tentang (keburukan) Sally sebenarnya lebih mencerminkan siapa Susie sebenarnya dibandingkan tentang Sally.

Sehingga kalau ada orang yang mempertanyakan kredibilitas dan kemampuan kelompok kecil ini, maka kita sudah dapat menebak mentalitas dan kemampuan orang(orang) tersebut. Mereka mungkin berpikir mereka lebih baik dari orang lain.... dan lebih baik dari kami yang ada dalam tim yang baru dilantik ini.

Tak masalah! Tak perlu mempermasalahkan hal ini.

Bagi saya pribadi ini semakin meneguhkan pembelajaran pribadi dan prinsip saya yang telah saya bangun dan percayai selama ini bahwa saya tidak dan tidak perlu merasa dan membuktikan bahwa saya lebih baik dari orang lain. Kalau saya berpikir begini terus saya akan selalu membandingkan diri saya dengan orang lain. dan jika ini terjadi saya tidak akan pernah merasa puas.

Saya sangat puas dengan diri saya, kegagalan saya dan pencapaian-pencapaian saya selama ini. Saya bangga bisa bertemu dengan banyak orang-orang hebat. The only person I need to be better is my yesterday self. For everyday, I want to be a better person. For me and an example for my daughter.

So yes, kami muda dan masih harus banyak belajar. Tapi belajar harus dimulai pada suatu titik kan? dan ini adalah titik awal kami. Kami mungkin harus jatuh bangun namun ini proses belajar kami.

This is the beginning friends! The road is long... but victory awaits!

Kartini

It was Kartini Day 2 days ago, April 21, in Indonesia. I passed the day with excruciating stomach due to menstrual pain. There can’t be no other time more suited for these 2 events to collide. Let me reflect to you some of my thoughts about Kartini and being a woman.

Kartini’s legacy was a collection of her letters to her friends in the Netherlands published in a book called “Door Duisternis Tot Licht” (Through Darkness to Light) or translated to Indonesian as “Habis Gelap Terbitlah Terang”. She also has a school for women whom she established in Rembang. Because of these and several other considerations, she was named the one of Indonesian hero on women emancipation.

For some times, I was a bit unsure whether she is a hero. Like several of my other friends, Kartini does not fight as gallantly as Martha Christina Tiahahu or Cut Nyak Dien and other female Indonesian hero who fought the colonialism. She has quite a privilege to be a daughter of a higher class family which entitled her to education where she became fluent in Dutch and I imagine several other subjects as well. Although her education was caught short in her early teen years, she was allowed to have skills course.

However, as I was lying with stomach cramps, excruciating headache and nausea, I came to think that even though she did not gallantly fought with weapons or sacrifice herself in war fields or even put up a real fight against her parents, her actions, ideas and thoughts were ‘loud’ for her era. Here is my thought why, I think the Hero title is rightfully hers.

She was born in an era or darkness where women were boxed in. Had she not gone to school, getting educated, meet people and learn foreign language, she might not be open to the fact that there is a glimmer of hope for her, for women for her kind.

Reading a bit of a review about her life helped me to see that she is no weak and submissive person. Her will power and intelligence is what set her apart. I think she excelled in school especially in language (Dutch). I imagine, the language helped her to find ways to ‘rare ideas’ books – perhaps philosophy, biography of women leader, religion and many others- Perhaps books in Melayu language were censored or biased on the ideas of women position. But being able to skillfully use Dutch language enabled her to read more books with advanced thought on women emancipation. I believe she dared to dream! Dream that perhaps… just perhaps… I too can be emancipated or I can emancipate other women. Martin Luther King was known with his dream. Yes, he was killed shouting it out loud so others can hear. But so does Kartini! She shouted it out loud most importantly for HERSELF! She was liberating herself. For those who was once felt confided, imprisoned, being brainwash that you are just a stool in the room, being blindfolded and being told that you are blind, gagged your mouth and being told that you have no voice and who really  live in the dark… whispering your OWN ideas IS liberating and BRAVE!

Who would support Kartini at that era? She was bound to so many restricted rules of her class, rules of being women, obligation as child to parents, love to ailing parents. If you are a woman, you will be able to identify these obligations. The difference with us women nowadays is we know that we can do something and we can stand by ourselves. Back in Kartini Era, she doesn’t know. She wanted to believe that she can but all her support system says NO YOU CAN’T. What can she do? Blessed her little heart, she found a Dutch friend whom she could correspond and poured out her thoughts.

The problem with Kartini day, in my opinion, is not exactly about Kartini herself. It is in how it is celebrated. I do think Kartini will not agree that the emancipating and liberating day is celebrated with silly symbolic costume party of Kebaya and sanggul! As someone who tried so hard to liberate her own thoughts, I assume Kartini would not have wanted such diverse cultured women of Indonesia to succumb to an elaborate get-up to javanisized women of Indonesia.

As for her lack of fighting in comparison to Cut Nyak Dien, Martha Christina Tiahahu and other respective heroines, I simply would like all of us to not generalized fighting. Kartini’s thoughts and actions are not to be compared to other heroes. She belongs in her own fighting and own category. Considering her era, her circumstances and her short span of life, her thoughts are inspirational and ahead of her time. Should she has a long life, I believe she might be able to do a lot more. She might be able to breakthrough.

There I was, in extreme menstrual pain, contemplating the complicated life of women. And Kartini… hats off to you! You are an inspiration to me for your liberating thoughts. – As for Kartini day, we are not celebrating Kartini’s life! We are celebrating the liberation of women’s thoughts and actions.

My Apologies

Well well well...

It appears that I have neglected my blog for quite a while.
I do humbly apologize for those people in my life who has been tickling me about getting back writing. I know some people read my blog but I didn't realize that they were looking forward for a new entry. My goal to create this blog was to record my thoughts. I was a diary writer during my growing up days. And blog just seems to be the right platform. My initial (and still is) goal is not to raked as many readers and followers but simply to share and connect. So again thank you for enjoying and taking lessons from my blog entries. Thank you for urging me to write again. And... please forgive me for neglecting it for so long.

Let me fill you in of what happen since my January post.
- I have passed the CPNS Tests (Calon Pegawai Negeri Sipil // Government officials Recruitments Tests) to be the lecturer of English at my almamater, FKIP Bahasa Inggris (English Department of Faculty of Teacher's Training) of Pattimura University. My documents are currently being process to attain my Official Registry Numbers etc. So... yeah... prior to that my days were filled with complying to the process of certification, documents gathering and the likes.

- Our Language Center, Marlene's Language Center is thriving. we got an overwhelming request and applications of new students that we had to turned some of them down. Meanwhile a more pressing priorities are for us to perfected our management system, preparing facilities and at the same time maintaining the level of quality we set.

- We still helped out as part-time lecturers of English at Accounting Department at our local Politechnics. 

- Our Little Girl Tania, the most important and the center of our life, is now a starter reader. She can read 3 or 4 letters words and I have spotted some reading challenges that I can help her with, such as the different pronunciation of 'i' and 'c' when it is combined with different letters in a word. I shall write a separate updates for that. Meanwhile we have begun to think and to consider several Pre-School for her.

Other than that, it is mainly to spend and create quality time with Tania and Simon, my better half. In this retrospects. I do not regret letting go the opportunities for workshops, seminars, gatherings etc etc... these quality times we spent are most important.

I thank God that I have the privilege of choice of being able to choose to give up some work opportunities to stay and make time with my daughter and husband. I reserve no judgement of my other fellow mothers who had to work and do not my have my privilege. Seriously, there are no correct parenting and marriage method. Each one of us need to see what works. What works for me might not work entirely for others and vice versa. We simply need to take the best learning curve and apply and evaluate and come up with our own style. what matters is that our husband and child(ren) knows how much we love them. That we do not forget to tell them that. That we do not forget to give them a few seconds of loving hugs. That we give 5 minutes of our time to simple listen to them and give them a loving touch.

All in all everyone! Make moments to remember... that doesn't have to cost a lot of money. Chances are it's free. As free as a smile, a hug .-

New Year!!! What's New?

So it's 2015!!! Happy New year!!!
Hope you have a brilliant start of the year.
My 2015 begins with a shaky start. Illness... my little family begin with unhealthy body. As I am writing this my lil' Girl is on the road to recovery. Poor girl has lost a lot of weight. So sad to see her that way. My husband was also taken ill as the new year rolls. I have some medical conditions that I need to continue to checked on. All in all, it wasn't a smashing, brilliant start of the new year. However, the time spent caring for them has allowed me to reflect, consider and be thankful of all the amazing blessings we have over the years. I am sharing with you my thankful list

1.  I am thankful for my life. The ups and downs, the joy, the sadness, the success and the failures, the wisdom, the mistakes. All of those helped me to be a better person. 
2. I am thankful for my husband. My rock, my friend, my lover, the loving father of my child. He who liberates and keeps me grounded. 
3. My little girl who taught me more about what worth living for. She is the axis of where our world revolves. 
4. My family - yes, they can be frustrating to dealt with but they are the only people in the world who truly know me, accept me and love me. no matter what happen, i know they have my back.
5. My friends - what is life without them. Both old and new, they are unique and they brought different spices to my soup of life
6. LKP Marlene's Language Center - this is our family business. It has been very kind to us. Through the year we have learned a lot through it both about Language teaching and management. We continue to develop and improve. But I am most thankful for the opportunity it gives for me to work from home. (Some people will understand what a luxury this is).
7. Opportunities and Open Doors - 2014 ended with many doors opens for me. It is a blessings. It is only grace. They led to many roads i can choose for to journey 2015.
8. Life experience - seriously! Both good and bad! I won't trade my life for anything. My life is amazing.
9. Teaching - what better way to bring about change than being a teacher. I got to do what I am passionate about and touching lives of many in the process. I am thankful, I have the privilege of sharing my knowledge. 
10. Food on our table, clothes on our bodies, roof over our heads, money in our wallets, motorcycle for our transportation, communication gadgets and what not, Safety on our journeys, smiles to warm our days, ideas that inspire and motivates -- and the list goes on. Thank you Jesus

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Unlike the past years, this year I didn't make any resolution. It is not that I am dealing with sickness but because I just don't feel like making one. My last 2 years resolutions never get done. So this year I decided not to make any life. but to take notes of what I learned and what need to be improved.
The illness that begins this year has helped to remind me that the care for body and soul is important. Time for family is crucial. Time management is major.

It is most definitely going to be another the busiest year of my life. However, I will try to find balance. To have more intimate time with God, To put my little girl and husband first on the list of my work, to make sure I do not bit more than I can chew, to ask for help and to care for myself.Sounds like a resolution in itself... hehehe.

So again, Happy New Year! May you find what is important in life and do your best to find balance in yours.-